Paragraph 1
Strength:
The first bullet point is addressed effectively, employing appropriate vocabulary (contemplating, secluded) and complex sentence structures. The text demonstrates grammatical accuracy with correct tense usage.
Suggested Revisions:
– “my house, from Park Street to West Avenue, last time we had met” → my house from Park Street to West Avenue when we last met
– “in much better place” → in a much better location
– “Pak Exotica on Ocean Road” → Pak Exotica, situated on Ocean Road
– “its approach is far more better” → its accessibility is significantly better
Paragraph 2
Strength:
The second bullet point is clearly explained using contextually suitable vocabulary (reluctant) and syntactically varied sentences. Grammar and tense remain consistently accurate.
Suggested Revisions:
– “In fact this is” → In fact, this is
– “AT first” → At first
– “All my life” → all my life
– “let me tell you the people” → let me tell you, the people
– “and insider” → an insider
Paragraph 3
Strength:
Supplementary details are provided to enrich the description of the home.
Suggested Revisions:
– “a 24-hour helpline for any of your needs” → a 24-hour helpline is accessible for any emergencies
Paragraph 4
Strength:
The closing paragraph maintains grammatical coherence without tense errors.
Suggested Revisions:
– “stay with me and all in all have an outstanding” → stay with me to fully enjoy an outstanding
Band Score Estimate: 7
The response successfully addresses all task requirements with logically structured explanations. While minor punctuation and capitalization errors persist, grammatical accuracy and lexical diversity meet the criteria for Band 7.
